after 11 years in Japan, I am no closer to understanding the Japanese mind. Ask about "honne" and "tatemae" tell me when to distinguish between them.
There are some very honest and nice Japanese, and there are some who aren`t... just like everywhere else... no different..., we seem to have this image of the people before comong here and living for a period of time, I did as well. My wife is Japanese, her extended family are among the nicest people I`ve met anywhere, made me feel like a part of the family immediately. Some of my students are great too.
One of my students is a retired woman who has had an interesting life and she once told me things are easier for me here because I have blue eyes... she told me to ask Asians from other countries who come here to live how things are. The word gaijin means foreigner, but it also means outsider. There is a more polite form of that word, gaigokojin.
Hope it doesn`t sound like I`m complaining, I`m not, but I do make observations after so many years here and the moment I`m no longer happy in the country...I`ll leave. It is an interesting place to live, one where I`m tolerated but rarely made to feel welcome. Certainly a beautiful country, one of my hobbies is photography and there are endless opportunities for that. All in all, I made the right decision coming here, I`ve learned a lot, have a job I love and am still happy here. Everybody should come to Japan at least once in their lifetime.